Can't Wear Pants, Will Not Dance, Arcade Romance.

just a warning: this post may be boring and written with very little detail on account of i'm very tired and sickly.

good morning. i've been without sleep since 6:14 yesterday morning. it's 11:27 AM now, and i normally can't pull that sort of thing off. granted, i did have a nap or two, but they hardly helped anything. the reason why i eschewed sleep? it was PROM! that's right. dani actually got permission to stay the night with her prom group at her buddy duncan's house after prom, and she actually attempted to pull an all-nighter.

evan came and picked me up at one so that we could go to duncan's and get our pictures taken by a huge crowd of parents with cameras. our prom group stood awkwardly, plastering fake smiles to our faces, as the room filled with flashes and clicks and all matters of "oh, don't you look great!" evan himself had said, "wow," at me enough that i didn't need another compliment, and i had awkwardly muttered about how he looked pretty spiffy, too, so i hope he felt good about himself as well. we stood around for way too long as those relentless parents snapped photo after photo after goddamn photo, and then the parents began to slowly disperse (evan's mom hugged me!), and we were finally allowed to head off to the civic center to wait for our party bus.

the party bus wasn't at all what i was expecting. it was just a smelly, gutted-out school bus with sideways seats on one side, regular seats on the other, a space cleared out in the back for dancing, a nice lil' balcony outside of the back door, and another platform on the top of the bus. there were pictures of a line of people mooning the camera, which was weird but funny. i actually kind of liked the bus. the music playing was usually of no interest to evan or me; we're more into "indie" music, not the shit that plays on the radio all day. well, actually, he's into indie music, and i basically just listen to whatever he or galen throws my way. not always, of course; i'm a tad bit picky, and i'm devoted to the bands i already listen to. anyway, i grumbled at evan the whole time to Fun City, and played silly games with (SECRET FRIEND) after she caught me kissing evan.

when we got to Fun City, i put on my most ripped-up pair of green hi-tops and headed inside. evan and i got twenty bucks onto our fancy little card and immediately went to spend seven of that on bowling. i am really bad at bowling. i lost. but evan got second-to-last... he still kicked my ass. after bowling, we ordered our food at a restaurant inside of Fun City and ran off to spend more of our arcade monies while we waited for our food. i'm addicted to that game where the light goes around in a circle and you have to hit the button just as the light goes under some arch thingy, then you win the jackpot. i got a shit ton of tickets from that, but i didn't win the jackpot. i played ms. pacman (evan kept saying, "wow," at this; maybe the one thing i'm good at is playing video games?), and soon enough we had to head back to eat. the food was tasty, and someone had ordered a freakin' pizza that had a... 28? inch diameter. it was fucking crazy. i didn't eat any, but it looked delicious.

after we ate, there wasn't much time to spend the last of our arcade monies. i ran off to the gamblin' machine, as i call it, and evan tried some Deal or No Deal game. i probably won around 150 tickets. he won eleven (damn Deal or No Deal). we pooled our tickets together and came up with 313, but evan still had arcade monies left, so we went to the gamblin' machine again, and he spent the rest there. he got the jackpot once (victory kiss), but he and i both swear that we won several other times but the game is rigged. anyway, we ended up with around 550 tickets. we waited around for service, chose our prizes (two inflatable bats; why the hell not?), and ran outside to find that the party bus was waiting all the way across the parking lot. we ran, bats in hand, as the bus driver pretended to drive away from us. my shoe fell off (that's how beaten up they are). the ride home was fun. we played old classics like michael jackson, and i could actually sing along this time around.

riding in the parade on the back of that party bus was great, but prom in itself was really not that exciting. of course they played pop music that i didn't care to know, and i don't dance. i slow danced with evan a couple of times, but there were probably only two slow songs! i don't know, if you're going to be all fancy and gussied up, shouldn't you preserve your lovely appearance for as long as possible instead of jumping around, tangling your $50 hairdo and stinking up your $300 dress? i don't know, maybe i'm the only one who feels that way. evan and i decided to leave a little bit early and went to duncan's house, where our prom group would watch movies and play video games for most of the night. evan and i left at around three AM to go get some funky energy shot, which kicked in almost immediately and, for me, caused a crash just as quickly. evan was fine, but soon i was sleepily curled up on the couch with a sudden stuffy nose and burning sore throat. evan did everything in his power to try and make me feel better (who says chivalry is dead?), but my sudden sickness is still with me now. he cuddled with me, he asked around for medicine, he took me to find my own couch to lie on, etcetera, etcetera. he was just being a total sweetheart and i appreciate it to no end. it's only a cold, but he seemed genuinely concerned for me. i was feeling sickly, tired, and giddy, and eventually i just kind of went, "aww, fuck this. it's not doing me any good to sit around and dwell on how awful i feel. i'm going to go upstairs and i'm going to do the all-nighter i told evan we were going to do." so i went upstairs and watched Dogma, and evan and i tried in vain to fall asleep on the floor, since all the couches and chairs were taken up by other members of our prom group. there were a bunch of us, and the majority of us got the floor. it was itchy and so was the blanket that evan and i had snatched from the couch earlier, but evan was nice 'n comfy. i could hear duncan's parents making us breakfast at around five or six in the morning, and in a few hours we all pulled ourselves out of our restless slumber and chowed down. over all, prom day was really fun. i'm glad i agreed to go, since i was never planning on doing so.

i stayed responsible, like i said i would. no alcohol, no drugs, no sex. i'm a good kid. i told my parents i didn't do those things, and they believed me. they let me stay at duncan's and i'm grateful that they trusted me, even if i had to go into an in-depth discussion with my mom about how i couldn't be doing anything wrong during prom night before she finally gave in and agreed that there was no time for me to get away with anything (even though there was time, but i still didn't do anything that i shouldn't have. for the most part).

I Hope You Have a TERRIBLE FUCKING DAY.

happy valentine's day, everyone! i'm working on getting into my bitterest of moods for my bitter party. don't worry: all my bitterness is completely sarcastic. so... i'm just sitting at home, waiting for ashley to get her ass over here, and if we want to invite more bitter people who refuse to date, we will. i'm going to practice bitterness now.
bah, valentine's day! who would waste twenty dollars on a stuffed gorilla holding a heart? and, pfft, like anyone would want a stuffed gorilla, anyway! i mean, they're only absolutely adorable and soft and cuddly. pfft, i don't need it. i don't even need someone to want to get me a stuffed gorilla. men are chauvinist pigs! to give a girl a valentine is to beg for sex. men have ulterior motives for every kind gesture! "here, let me open the door for you!" really means "PLEASE LET ME FUCK YOU." "you have such a pretty smile" means "i've been staring at your mouth and i want to stick my tongue down your throat." y'know, if someone showed up on my porch with roses or chocolates (INTENTIONS OF SEXING ME), i might just hit them over the head with the lamp by the door and stomp on their groin when they fall over in pain. and then, as they're puking from the gut-twisting pain, i'll grab a piece of wood from the piles on the porch and whack 'em in the head again. by this point they'll be out cold, so i'll drag 'em inside, strap 'em down, and castrate the bastard. he will scream in pain, beg for forgiveness, beg to keep his balls, but it will be too late. and then, because i am not a surgeon, they will die from blood loss. oh, well!
it's sickening to hear all these gooey stories about how "oooh, my boyfriend just got me a diamond necklace! we're so much in love, we're going to get married, nurr." and then there are the people like me, who really would like something but would rather act all bitter about it. however, i'm being bitter for fun. i believe that there has got to be at least one terribly negative bitch on valentine's day, and i don't know who else will do it! but i really am one of those mopey girls who sit around the house daydreaming about opening the door to find a boy holding just the right valentine's gift, smiling shyly with a twinkle in his eye, ready to grab you and kiss you deeply, totally unlike him and totally awesome. but of course there's that other part of me that is all, "EW BOYS ARE GRODY, HE HAS ULTERIOR MOTIVES; HE WANTS TO RAPE YOU ON YOUR OWN PORCH," and that's the main part of me, the part i rely on for every day decisions. "oh, great conscience, should i invite over so-and-so?" "NO, CHILD. HE WILL RAPE YOU, YOU WILL GET PREGNANT, AND YOU WILL DIE DURING CHILDBIRTH." "oh, conscience, should i say something romantic?" "NO, YOU SHOULD PROBABLY SAY SOMETHING HORRIBLY CYNICAL AND THROW HIM OFF. HE CAN'T RAPE YOU IF YOU CONFUSE HIS PENIS." things like that.
so, yeah! i like the idea of romanticism, but it terrifies me. i love me some cute guys, but they're awful, chauvinist pigs who will rape me at any given moment.